Lights from Salem

Musings and thoughts of a traveler and armchair linguist on his journey through the ups and downs of life.

Thursday, January 07, 2021

This Now

After Christmas but before the turn of the year I once again found myself driving through four states as I left one home to get to the other. In the past I would have been more inclined to entertain myself by listening to music and then taking a break from the noise from my speakers to organize the noise of my thoughts. In the last decade, however, I’ve kept myself occupied with podcasts and, more recently, audiobooks.

Nevertheless, the audiobook I had on deck was breaking its promise to be a funny and fascinating yarn. The story was annoyingly dull and populated with shallow, unlikeable characters, and its sense of humor was closer to dragging its knuckles along the tiles of a locker room floor. The lengthy podcast, in turn, was decidedly much more entertaining and better aimed towards my twisted sense of dark humor, but I still found myself needing to take periodic breaks from its tragic biography of a haunted, shattered serial killer staggeringly deep in the throes of schizophrenia.

Therefore, as it came to pass, I found myself thinking about my life as it stood. I have not done terribly for myself personally or professionally, but am still a country mile or three from where I had thought I’d be by now. I have been professionally frustrated and, without too much mulling over, I realized I had reverted to my bad habit of comparing myself to others my age. This of course is about the worst possible way to go about addressing an issue. It was leaving me feeling inadequate and under-accomplished. I wouldn’t call it a midlife-crisis (in particular since I’m in my thirties) but there was still a real uncertainty about how much I’ve been feeling my way along the course of time, wondering if my instincts have been wrong, or if I’ve gone astray and will continue to go so without realizing it.

I don’t necessarily believe any of these thoughts, but the thought was noisy, like an alarm, and hard to dismiss. Most of us tend to trust our thoughts, although I think it is more out of the intimacy we feel towards them: they are simultaneously our most trusted advisors and alarm systems, as well as tyrannic nuisances misguided or, worse yet, outright dishonest and cruel.

Around hour 10 my ass was so numb I wondered if maybe it wasn’t attached anymore. I was grouchy and tired and the sun was going down so there wasn’t even much to look at outside.

While going under a viaduct, however, something clicked. It wasn’t entirely unexpected, but its clarity still took me by surprise. It was like how suddenly the invisible name of a movie right on the tip of your tongue materializes in your mouth. But was clearer than any bit of trivia: amid my physical discomfort and tiredness not to mention my mental anxiety and unrest, I realized that I was aware of all these sensations. It took no effort to be aware of them, the way it takes no effort to suddenly feel your clothes on your body or the chair you are in, once you remember you are wearing clothes or sitting in a chair. And while all the sensations were apparently different from one another, in my seeing them I realized they were all on the same level of existence, similar to how waves in water may all be different sizes or have different apparent smoothnesses or shades of greens, blues, greys, and whites, yet are all on the same level of the ocean. And with this, I saw that while indeed many of these discomforts, in particular the mental ones, were obviously unpleasant when compared to feelings of rest and satisfaction, the power assigned to them came not from the feeling of pain itself, but from my believing in them, never questioning that such discomfort may, despite all appearances, be superficial.

In other words, for instance, the notion that other people aren’t feeling their way along in life may or may not be true, but the anxiety in that doesn’t come from its truth or lack thereof. Rather, the anxiety comes from feeling the discomfort and believing it must be coming from some objective truth about my life or the world around me, or both.

From that perspective, what seemed like a thundering, restless storm of ceaseless concerns in life became more a brood of dust devils. The irritation and motion and distraction and discomfort were all there. It would be wrong to deny that. But the problems were generally absent. It seemed more like life was just appearing to me, in its situations and forms and shapes. It felt easier to simply observe and respond as needed rather than feel compelled to impulsively react to all of it at once, feeling like I was all on my own to find my way and racing a clock all the while.

Over the next couple of days I felt a freshness in the air, like how I feel when springtime is breaking through. I wondered why I would feel so unencumbered since it wasn’t even January yet, let along spring. I assumed it had something to do with the Austin weather, which was still warm compared to what December usually is in most other parts of the country. But even while running mundane errands I felt a freeness and optimism. I didn’t think it was because 2020 was ending, despite its reputation as a God-awful year, although I do have an optimistic curiosity at the beginning of every new year. I didn’t analyze the feeling too much other than trying to think about how I might describe it. The sensations were obvious, but the words for it were not. It was like trying to paint a picture of feelings. To me it felt like a living air moving through me, as though I had a giant space in my body that was being opened up refreshing and invigorating, like a sweet air full of light clearing out the stuffy, stale air of a cave after the end of a winter.

On the heels of this feeling however, there were the old concerns of being trapped, of being stuck in a rut professionally, of being personally lost and too old to change:

That’s for someone who is in their late 20s, tops! By your mid-30’s you need to have it figured out, have a house owned, already be married, be established!

Oddly, sometimes these feelings would almost co-exist next to one another.

But, once again, it occurred to me that these thoughts might be misplaced, or at best misassigned. How does one feel free and at the same time feel stuck? On reflection, I think it’s because you are free. Maybe not free to drop everything and hitchhike across the country, or not free because you have debt to pay off or a family to be responsible for. Free, though, from the obligation of assigning and locking yourself into a fate. Free from existential anxiety that is more often than not shadows moving out the peripheral vision of your soul’s eye, disturbing you and making you think something is real when it isn’t and if, on looking, there is anything objectively factual there at all.

Free to enjoy life and even appreciate the discomforts for what they are, even if they aren’t enjoyable in the usual sense. Preference for comfort arises, but it’s perhaps wiser to not place too much stock in preferences since it leads more often to disappointment. The architecture of music and flavor consists of several distinct nuances. So does the experience of life.

As to this feeling of lightness co-existing with the frustration of being stuck in a rut, I interpreted this as a reminder that one is never done growing in life, rather than assuming it to be an objective sign of a fact that one is stuck. Learning, therefore, to enjoy life in all its appearances including appreciating the challenges and pains and discomforts and frustrations.

It also became clear that a lot of my personal anxiety is rooted in my comparing myself not to others, but to myself in the future. Why am I not “there” yet? When will I get “there”? What am I doing to sabotage myself? I thought I’d be “there” years ago and I’ve lost so much time already while everyone is already “there”!

For a second, I cut away the root to a projected “me” in the future and with that same clarity could see that as long as I am alive and functioning I am still growing, and much of that growing is spontaneous and seemingly random but not necessarily disordered. A planet has no brain but still forms mountains and rivers and habitats. Mindless cells without any formal instruction or encouragement form complex lifeforms, capable of living thousands of years, like redwood trees. Maybe it’s less important to marry one’s self to a projection and healthier to appreciate where one is now and trust that when it is time to act, an action will come about.

For over a decade I’ve given a lot of thought to the idea of being present, or being in the now. It sounded pretty and at first glance wise, but I would also be dismissive of it, usually because the people telling me sounded like they were out of touch. And that may very well be how I sound in this writing. But it isn’t something that I can tell anyone to do any more than I can tell anyone the satisfying feeling of sitting down after having stood for hours. And, now that I think about it, telling someone to be present strikes me as a rather useless platitude, because what the hell does that even mean?

For myself, though, it doesn’t mean being joyous and never having pain or irritation, or all the answers, although I think this is the erroneous impression people may have of it. To me, being present means joy reflects in the same mirror that irritation does, but both can be seen for what they are. You are not doomed or fated to anything. You are just aware of them, and of everything else around you, just as you are aware of your own self.

Sunday, March 29, 2020

Chaos and Order

I haven’t written in my blog for so long I’ve wondered if I’d ever come back to it. A few people have asked me over the years if I continue to write though, and I mean to.

So, some thoughts.

The other day, a friend wondered if life has a plan, or if everything is chaos (I don't recall her question verbatim but this was the essence of it). I told her I didn’t think it was chaos, but wasn’t sure how to choose my words to explain what I thought, but I’ve found that I’ve come back to her question a few times.

These past few weeks have certainly felt chaotic. The world has, in large part, come to a standstill, and we as a species have been forced to realize just how fragile so many things in our society can be. These are things that we read about in history books, but something most people in my generation, at least in the western developed world have never had to experience.

Yet maybe hibernation is in order. I’m not saying the state of things is part of a grand mystical plan. I don’t think there is such a thing as a master plan. But if chaos means disorder and confusion, I don’t think we are well-qualified to say that the universe is ruled by chaos.

A healthy human body functions well to the naked eye, but at the cellular level cells are constantly fighting off harmful elements in what probably would resemble war. At that level it would seem chaotic, but at the corporal level, it would seem orderly. If we look at the cellular war, even there we could also say it is orderly because we can assign meaning to it, saying it is an obvious case of healthy, protective cells versus disease-causing bacteria, and of course it is there to keep our bodies healthy.

Our lives seem planned out, but our plans can be easily disrupted and we sometimes see no meaning or reason to it. Humans hate uncertainty, and we assign meaning to help us cope, but perhaps we are already following a certain order that we just cannot get a perspective of. In a way, maybe we are the cellular elements of our planet bodies. Perhaps our universe itself is a similar to a cell in a larger body of sorts we cannot even fathom.

The point is, I don’t think there is any answer to the question, but none of these means this question shouldn’t be asked or pondered. The question is there and it’s worth investigating. These types of questions can lead one down paths that are more significant than any concrete answer.

None of this is to trivialize tragedies or inspire naval-gazing when acting is appropriate: Doing what you can to stay healthy and helping keep others healthy. And such questions and their responses are rarely helpful, not to mention particularly unwelcome, when one is looking for practical advice. Nevertheless, we are also a species that looks for meaning as well as practical answers.

So my answer to her would be, I don’t think the universe is chaotic. I think it is spontaneous, but I do think there is an order or intelligence behind that spontaneity, the way you may not know which direction precisely a leaf will float through the sky, but it still float in the only way it could at that particular instant. Spontaneous, yet simultaneously with an order to it. Maybe you could reverse-investigate how the leaf floated by predicting wind patterns or heat coming off the pavement, but do so thoroughly would take you down an endless path that would still branch out with the same types of questions. However that intelligence is interpreted, be it religious, mystical, scientific, is also another way of the human mind trying to put meaning to something.

Whatever life ultimately is, it is beyond meaning, however. It is beyond labels. Maybe that is something we could take away from this period in history. Just because we can’t find a meaning or a reason to uncertainty, inconvenience, or even tragedy, it doesn’t necessarily mean that anything went wrong.

Wednesday, November 21, 2018

Late November Thoughts

I’ve been finding that life tends to solve a lot of its own questions, which makes sense when you stop and think about it, since the questions come up based in life itself. What I mean by this is, there is no question that you can ask if you aren’t alive first to ask it. And, if you are alive, you are therefore experiencing life, and those experiences are part of you, and the questions, the questioner, and the circumstances related to the questions are all tied into the same essence, the same way that the colors of a rainbow and the light passing through it are the same essence. 

Often, the result is that the answers appear before the question even does. Which is quite nice to consider, when you don’t precisely know what you want to write, even though you have the feeling to write something. I’ve felt compelled to write on this again for a while now, with ideas that have been rattling around in my mind like noticeable but infrequent hoots from unseen birds in a dusk forest.

I also think this might be something to keep in mind when we look around and see that the world seems to be falling apart with wars, migrations, hurt feelings, ruined lives, and other injustices.

It seems to me though that we might be poor judges of recognizing what is good for us. We are always looking around at what is going wrong, and rarely stop and notice that the power came on today, the car started, or that you didn’t suddenly lose feeling in the entire left side of your body while trying to tame a bear, which would be a quite a bad day.

Nothing is perfect, people say, but how do people know this? To understand perfection, you have to have a reference point, and if nothing is perfect, then how can we understand what perfection is? Either we must admit to ourselves that we have no idea what we are talking about, or maybe the answer is that indeed things are perfect, that we already are perfect beings in a perfect world, and the notion of perfection must be challenged.

It seems senseless and unfair to go to a tree and complain that it can’t bear fruit when its still only a sapling. That tree is still perfect, but just at a different point in perfection.

By extension, I believe we would be well to bear in mind that the world at all levels, from the environmental one, to the personal world in an immediately lives, bodies, and minds, is constantly in flux, changing and developing, rather than holding it as a broken failure, being run into the ground, and a lost cause. It’s hard to argue that there aren’t real issues to be dealt with in terms of environment and questions of peace between cultures and their individuals, not to mention personal conflicts that arise in our own lives. And if one feels compelled to go and change something, then they should go as they feel compelled, and see if they can’t make a better version of the world or themselves. Humans and human effort are part of the motion of the planet. But keep in mind that it is life at work, and individuals cannot necessarily lay claim to the effort of the good or bad achieved. A river can carve a canyon, but the flowing motion is not any effort on the part of the river. Is this not also true in the lives of people? While people have choices, their decisions never come out of a vacuum, but instead are the results of a lifetime of exposure and conditioning, much that they had no control over themselves. I don’t say this means people have the right to act irresponsibly, but if we try to remember there is a universe of motion behind each action, we might see situations as something to be curious about and interested in, rather than something to despair or hate.

When you take time to look, you see that the point of life is not exactly to be comfortable or always happy. I’m not sure life has a point or even demands one, any more than the babbling of a brook has a point. It seems that it is content simply to be, and see what comes up, both in times of action, and in times of stillness.

Ultimately, life is still life, here to stay, no matter how we define it, no matter what form it takes, or how we try to destroy ourselves or save ourselves, or if it is recognized or not.

Thursday, January 18, 2018

2017 - Movies and Books

I took a year off from my blog, albeit not intentionally. It's just that currently I have very little to say. I do have some thoughts I've been mulling around, however.

That said, at end of every year or the start of the new one, I like to review the year in the books and movies I've read, seen, or inflicted upon myself, if it so happens to be the case.

The following lists are only for movies and books that were new to me this year. I don't include re-readings or re-watchings from prior years.

I also am thinking of including books I started but didn't finish and then tell why that book deserved to get the boot. Most likely because it sucked. But I might tell you precisely why it sucked. For instance, one book from this year would be Masters of Atlantis by Charles Portis which I started reading immediately after finishing True Grit, another much superior book by him.

Masters of Atlantis blew because I wanted to read an adventure book about Atlantis and instead it was about naive people and a cult. This is also interesting to me, but I thought the story dragged ass, and four or so chapters in it was not picking said ass up. And it was not an adventure story about Atlantis, which for me was the point of starting it. So I sent it back to library and that was that.

With that said, I present to you my lists. No thoughts beyond what these movies and books inspired, no observations about life, and no musings about future plans. Just a list, and some brief reviews, if the spirit moved me.

Movies

It was a year of catching up with decades of culture, where I finally saw some legendary stories made before I had ever been born. Generally, I feel like movies have become weaker and less inspired over the past few years, but there are still some great ones out there, and I was fortunate to see a few of them:

All the Money in the World – 2017
Sprawling, uneven, fairly dull, forgettable. However, all the acting is excellent, especially by Christopher Plummer, who could see a Best Actor nomination.

American Made – 2017
A fun movie, but it felt like it hit below the caliber that it was aiming for.

Atomic Blonde – 2017
The energy, the acting, the music, the dialogue, the look; everything about this movie was perfect or close to. Charlize Theron was stellar as usual. The story was exciting, and the movie was just simply cool. While awards are probably unlikely, I would note Theron as a Best Actress possibility as well as Adapted Screenplay. Definitely one of the year’s best movies.

Basic Instinct – 1992
This movie was surprisingly good. It doesn’t quite hold up but it was enjoyable, and Verhoeven’s movies always have a kind of powerful energy that they give off.

Beguiled, The – 2017
This was a real disappointment. Sophie Coppola is a capable story teller, and the setting of this movie was beautiful. It was well-acted by everyone but still dull, and rather forgettable.

Blade Runner: 2049 - 2017 
I enjoyed this movie a lot. It was atmospheric and the pace was in tune with the story. But I also was never die-hard about the original, so I didn't have a lot of emotional stock invested in the movie. Predictions: Best Cinematography, Best Visual Effects, Best Art Direction/Set Direction.

Brain Damage – 1988
An 80’s movie with a schlocky 80’s feel. Fun movie but best watched in a group while sloshed.

Cape Fear – 1991
Well-acted, but drawn out, and while the antagonist is supposed to look unstoppable, the story begins to look unbelievable.

Craft, The – 1996
Entertaining, but over the top. Definitely had the feel of a 90’s movie, and has very little staying power, although Fairuza Balk certain was striking.

Creepshow – 1982
Not scary, and certainly hokey, but still entertaining. The segment with the cockroaches has the best writing.

Darkest Hour – 2017
Moving, but not deeply impactful or overly memorable. Oldman is great, as always, though. Award predictions: Best Picture, Director, Actor (Oldman), Actress (Kristen Scott Thomas), Supporting Actress (Lily James), Original Screenplay, Editing, Costume Design, Art/Set Direction, Cinematography, Sound

Detroit – 2017
This was another major disappointment. Katherine Bigelow can really keep a movie going, as she has shown with The Hurt Locker and Zero Dark Thirty, which is so engrossing you feel like you are looking through a window into the past. This movie, however was simply disappointing. Well-acted to be sure and tense up until the third act where it loses steam. As a whole, almost completely forgettable, but Will Poulter’s performance was the best part of the film, and could see him get a Supporting Actor nod.

Dunkirk – 2017
I wanted to like this film more than I did. I saw it twice, once on Imax. Nolan is a visual director, and he shows this again as the true star of this movie is the cinematography along with the pounding, strung-out score. The film is experimental in structure, and somewhat washed out in feel, but it is visually a masterpiece, simple and massive. Possible nominations: Picture, Director, Cinematography, Editing, Sound, Sound Editing, Art Direction/Set Direction, Costume Design, Score. Mark Rylance could see a nod as well. Kenneth Branagh as well, possibly, due to the presence he commanded, although his screentime was very very brief. In the end though, it felt hollow and forgettable, although I know I am in the minority when I say that.

Europa Report – 2013
Believable, respectable as a story, technically well done, and tasteful in that the effects were realistic looking.

Fifty Shades Darker – 2017
Acting and writing suffer, but soundtrack was good for an otherwise soap-opera like movie.

Frantz – 2016
Poignant and human. A little uneven at points. Very well acted, but the story was engaging enough. However, it’s not really a film that calls for re-watching.

Friday The 13th – 1980
Rough and very tame by today’s standards, but minimalistic and claustrophobic-feeling. Nevertheless, it’s hard to believe that it was strong enough to become such a franchise.

Homesman, The – 2014
A good story, although sometimes confusingly told. Believable characters.

Invitation, The – 2015
Original, tense, and well directed. Ominous and keeps you guessing. This was one of the most original and engrossing movies I saw this year.

It Comes at Night – 2017
Not very scary. More effective as a psychological drama, but even at that it felt like it was missing some X factor to push it into a better movie.

It – 2017 (October 2017)
Sometimes uneven and too expository, but at times nightmarish, and very well acted by Skarskgård. Predictions: Best Actor (Skarsgård) (Unlikely), Best Make-Up, Best Art Direction/Set Direction, Best Costume Design

Killing of a Sacred Deer, The – 2017
The acting, writing, filming, and humor were all good. But this movie just fell flat and was rather forgettable, except for the sense of unease it sends off. Easily one of my least favorite movies of the year, although I enjoyed the dark humor in scenes that seemed to put much of the audience off.

Logan – 2017
Tragic and very human. I’ve never been a huge fan of comic book movies, but this was a good story.

mother! - 2017
The idea that this is the retelling of the Bible from nature's point of view made me see this movie in a completely different light. Because when I originally watched it I felt a bit like I was having a fever dream. I may watch it again, but I sure as hell may not, also. 

My Friend Dahmer – 2017
Well-acted, but laborious in parts. Felt clunky and uneven. Disappointing, since its source material was so good I read it in one sitting.

Nightcrawler – 2014
Fascinating story of a fascinating character. Gyllenhaal’s performance was all-out.

Nightmare Before Christmas, The* - 1993
Fun story and good-animation. Darkness of the story is beautiful, but the movie personally is not my style.

Nightmare on Elm Street – 1984
Holds up surprisingly well; special effects are still good, fire stunt was excellent, and its imagery did feel nightmarish.

Nocturnal Animals – 2016  
Dark, bleak, violent, depressing. Very well acted, and Michael Shannon deserves the recognition he is getting with his Best Supporting Actor nomination. But Amy Adams was snubbed out of a Best Actress nomination, and Aaron Taylor-Johnson especially was out of Best Supporting Actor for his portrayal of a dead-eyed psychotic killer. One of the best movies I saw this year.

Omen, The (1976)
Still well-made, but the feel of the horror doesn’t seem to translate over the years. 

Only the Brave: The Story of the Granite Mountain Hotshots – 2017
Despite a very animated looking bear on fire, this movie hits all the notes. An excellent tribute to the people it’s about. Easily on the best movies of the year. Possible Oscars: Best Picture, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Visual Effects, Best Cinematography

Shape of Water, The – 2017
Moving, charming, albeit predictable, but it is a dark, modernish (circa 1960’s) fairy tale. Predictions: Best Picture, Director, Actress (Sally Hawkins), Supporting Actress (Octavia Spencer), Actor (Michael Shannon), Supporting Actor (Bryan Cranston), Cinematography, Art/Set Direction, Costume Design, Makeup, Original Score, Editing, Sound

Silent Hill – 2006
It had potential, but felt more meandering than anything. But it did try to be nightmarish in its imagery, and was creative in that regard.

Silence – 2016  
Beautiful to look at, but very drawn out. It does capture Andrew Garfield’s character’s conflict in faith, battling against the eternity of damnation vs. saving the lives of the Christians around him. It felt like a Terrance Malick movie, although not quite as prone to meander when Malick waxes poetic. Cinematography nomination was well-deserved.

Split – 2016
Surprisingly good, given Shyamalan’s shaky record (although not as shaky as everyone says, in my opinion). James McAvoy deserves a Best Actor nomination. Possibly best original screenplay, too. Technically it is first rate, as it is with all of his movies.

Taking Lives – 2004
An ok movie. Unique city location was nice, and the twists keep it from becoming standard clichéd serial-killer movie-telling, but overall the movie was a ho-hum crime movie.

Thin Blue Line, The – 1988
Well-made, but not as memorable as I had expected. Still, it’s worth pointing out that this movie has power as it overturned a conviction. Nevertheless, it wasn’t as impactful or as engrossing as I had hoped.

Thing, The* - 1982
Good effects, fun story, gory, but tame by today’s standards.

Toni Erdmann – 2016
Long and slightly uneven, but wonderfully touching movie with a heart of bottomless love and tenderness. Acting is brilliant and very natural.

Under Sandet (Land of Mine) – 2015
Amazing, unassuming, simple, and moving movie. Definitely will be in the running of best movie I’ve seen this year.

We Need to Talk About Kevin – 2011
Very interesting story, and obviously snubbed on nominations for Best Actress and Best Actor

Whip Basics – A Beginners Guide: Vol. 2 – 2015
Whip Basics – A Beginners Guide: Vol. 3 – 2015
Whip Basics – A Beginners Guide: Vol. 4 – 2015
Some people like guns, some people like knifes, some like swords or bows and arrows. I learning the art of the whip and tap into my inner Indiana Jones. 

Wind River – 2017
Simply put, possibly my pick for best movie of the year. Cold, poignant, poetic. Not the best of the Frontier Trilogy, but nearly equal to “Sicario”, and still fantastic. Predictions: Picture, Director, Actor [Renner], Actress [Olsen], Original Screenplay, Cinematography, which simple but stark.

The competition was stiff for best movie seen this year

Best Movie of the Year:
Only the Brave: The Story of the Granite Mountain Hotshots – 2017

Second Best
Under Sandet (Land of Mine) – 2015

Honorable Mention
Atomic Blonde – 2017
Invitation, The – 2015
Nocturnal Animals – 2016  
Toni Erdmann – 2016

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Wind River – 2017

Books

11/22/63 
by Stephen King
Very good – rich and moving. It reaches out to the reader with feeling.

2001: A Space Odessey 
by Arthur C. Clarke

Art of Language Invention, The: From Horse-Lords to Dark Elves, the Words Behind World-Building 
by David J. Peterson

Bermuda Triangle, The 
by Charles Berlitz
Took me back to my roots where I would hunt around in the library for stories on ghosts and UFOs. Reading this was a fun and youthful experience. 

End of Watch 
by Stephen King

Finders Keepers
by Stephen King

Finding and Marketing to Translation Agencies: A Practical Guide for Freelance Translators 
by Corinne McKay

Glossika Mass Sentence Method: Mexican Spanish Fluency 1 
by Michael Campbell and Daisy Gomez
After having learned Spanish 15 years ago while living in Mexico, I finally got around to studying it more or less formally.

Glossika Mass Sentence Method: Mexican Spanish Fluency 2 
by Michael Campbell and Daisy Gomez
  
Glossika Mass Sentence Method: Mexican Spanish Fluency 3 
by Michael Campbell and Daisy Gomez

How to Make Whips 
by Ron Edwards
Informative and written with personality, which I had not expected. I haven't worked with leather yet, but this was a fun book on a rather obscure art. 

In the Garden of Beasts: Love, Terror, and an American Family in Hitler's Berlin 
by Erik Larsson
Moves along well, but the pace of timeline in final events gets a little confusing.

Killer Inside of Me, The 
by Jim Thompson

Last Blitzkrieg, The 
by Walter Freeman

Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck, The: How to Stop Spending Time You Don’t Have with People You Don’t Like Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do 
by Sarah Knight

Mr. Mercedes 
by Stephen King
I picked up this book and Finders Keepers at the library at the same time. I randomly chose to start with Mr. Mercedes, and lucky me because not only are the two books related, but they are the first two of a trilogy with Mr. Mercedes kicking it off. I would quite miffed had I plunked down in the bathtub to start a book, only to find I was starting halfway through longer story to another book I had had in my hands but had left at the library. 

No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex, and Life 
by Dr. Robert A. Glover
Good – Not completely applicable to me, but also validating at times

Red Sparrow 
by Jason Matthews
Boring – Slow-paced, dull. A shame because all the pieces were there for a more interesting story.

Revival
by Stephen King

Second Objective, The 
by Mark Frost
Fun and exciting, and interesting look at one of the most interesting German operations of World War II.

Self-Made Man: One Woman’s Year Disguised as a Man 
by Norah Vincent
Good but uneven and unexpectedly disturbing

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life 
by Mark Manson

Study in Germany! A Comprehensive Guide for Foreign Students 
by Gabriela Stefanut

True Grit 
by Charles Portis

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Best book of the year: 11/22/63
This book had the sweep of a one-man epic, covering years of his life. It was poignant and told with heart, and drew you into its world bringing it alive for you on a personal level.